“St.” Nick was admittedly a little confused this year, when - before he had officially installed the range into the new kitchen he had been working on all summer - Dr. Amber mentioned that we had a “bun in the oven”. He secretly thought to himself, “Well, without electricity, that’s gonna take quite a long time to bake! Probably like 9 months...” Wee Elf Cora figured it out right quick though, as she is the brightest bulb on any tree we’ve ever seen. Still, she likes to entertain her “St.” Dada’s silly ideas, and went along with it for him.

Meanwhile, in the North-er pole, St. Kiera has been pursuing parkour training - undoubtedly so she can take over the family trade of climbing down millions of chimneys every year, when her dear old dad finally retires. St. Vivs, however, is taking a different approach by quietly studying and learning the inner-workings of all things and is destined to not only run the business, but also, very likely, the entire world! And it doesn’t hurt that she’s absolutely adorable too.

Wishing you all the very happiest of holidays. May it bring with it a year of health, warmth, peace, love, & reinkitteh snuggles.

A millenia-old dispute over who the true master of worldwide delivery services is, was finally ended this year when The Stork brought Dr. Amber and “St.” Nick a peace offering. Given the astounding beauty and magical charm of this little bundle of joy, they could hardly refuse - and so they settled their remaining differences and instead decided to turn their collective ire towards the “new” kid on the block. Pshh... Bezos! Whatevs, loser.

Since then, there has been a lot of adjusting to the new little elf at the factory for the rein-kittehs and Guinea-deer. While they have definitely enjoyed all of the new places to curl up and nap in, they have yet to really reap the full benefits of having a little food-dropping monster around.

Meanwhile, at their new workshop in the norther pole, St. Kiera and St. Vivs continue to impress “St.” Nick with their cuteness, artistic ability, wit, and curiosity - leaving him to wonder when he might be able to retire and hand the family business over to them. “Probably never”, he concludes, “as they are all bound for much greater things! Oh well, more cookies and milk for me!”

Whether its cookies and milk, a nice place to curl up and get cozy, or a smile and a giggle from your adorable baby that makes your day... “St.” Nick, Dr. Amber, Wee-Elf Cora (& baby bear, baby penguin, baby octopus and baby monster), and all of the other assorted magical creatures here would like to wish you a lifetime of that happiness, and all of the childlike wonder, joy and health you can handle for this holiday season!

T’was about 2 months before the pandemic and I’ll tell you what we did…
We sat down to chat and revisit our plans to maybe have kids.
We said, “yeah sure, that all sounds great! The timing... seems just right.”
Even while ending in agreement, we thought at least we’d give it a night.
But we set forth on our path to parenthood & we did (wink wink) dirty deeds
*We’d like to apologize to our parents right now whose need to know, might not be a “need”
While the covid crisis ran rampant and around every corner, a new danger lurked
We were treated one day to amazing news that our little starting-a-fam-plan had totally worked!
But we feared the whole country would crumble - under pandemic and political strain.
We cringed as the Cheeto-in-charge and his minions acted out of self-interest and personal gain
Though we were worried about the future for our baby we pressed on despite our growing fear
That we’d be trapped here without social contact give for 4 fuzzy rein-kittehs and 1 Guinea deer.
We lost friends, we lost loved ones we lost dreams, and our pride
We were told to stay distant, stay apart, stay inside.
But even all of that couldn’t stop us - we weren’t living our lives just to live!
We have sooo, so much to look forward to and so much more love to give!
I’ve seen my St. Kiera just once in 3D, 10 months in waiting for all this to pass
But we have been Skyping on Sundays, so I can spend some time with my virtual lass
She has a new-ish sister! Little St. Vivs as she’s known.
And they’ve moved to a new house! And my god, how they’ve grown!
And speaking of houses, we’ve been hard at work on our house as well,
We finished the little apartment and every bit of it looks swell.
We had the house painted, and fixed all that was dire.
Like repointing the broken chimney so we could warm our bums by the fire.
But the work is not over just yet! As we must now make a manger…
With soft, rounded corners and holy sleep pads to help dispense with the danger.
Fore the little one is coming! Near the middle of March, or so we’re told
We look to the future and hope to stay healthy so we can be there all days as St. Jr. grows old.
And now that you’ve arrived at the end of this card, we have only two things to ask:
The 1st, that you have a happy & healthy Christmas. The 2nd, that you wear a F#@%ING mask.

This year has been so very hard in so many ways, and for so many people. We want you to know that we are thinking of all of you this holiday season, and always, and that we are wishing you happier, healthier and freer times ahead.

Merry Christmas & may your 2021 be full of life and love.

It has been a busy year for “St.” Nick, Dr. Amber and the critters! The old workshop had grown too small for their family and was on the wrong side of the Pole anyways… so they loaded everyone onto the sleigh and set off to find a new home. They landed in an amazing area with a great house, an attached apartment, a 5-sleigh garage, and all the room in the world to make a grand new base of operations! They even picked up a few new friends on the way to live with them... and maybe join the flight crew!

While they were in the middle of all of that, they were also putting forth a Herculean effort to fix up the old place, so they could list it with their friends at South-pole-eby’s, and sell it to someone who would hopefully appreciate it as much as they did. It turns out that one of the the nice folks who ended up buying it is a seasoned magical-flying-sleigh driver as well!
So we think that they’ll fit in just fine!

Even “St.” Kiera has had a long and crazy year of being the smartest, sweetest, funniest little elf there has ever been. Along with the arrival of her super cute little cousin, “St.” Max - her mom adopted a wee baby girl, “St.” Vivian, and “St.” Kiera has been very busy loving on her new baby sister and showing her the ropes: How to write and check naughty/nice lists, how to yoke up their rein-kittehs, and how to be totally adorable...
“St.” Viv seems to be catching on quickly, especially to that last part!

It has been a hard road for many, and for many reasons this year, but we are so very thankful to all of our friends and family who put in the effort and gave of themselves to help us out. We love you and wish you the happiest, healthiest and most relaxing of holidays & joy in the new year!

While attempting to go through their combined “Naughty & Nice” lists, “St.” Nick and Dr. Amber realized the flaw in their moving in together... the surmounting collection of rein-kittehs, plus the one and only Guinea Deer, Milo, were fixated on only one thing - eating, sleeping and contemplating the meaning of “one”. “How are we ever going to get through the lists if the crew is sleeping on them all?”, they thought. Fortunately, they had a trick up their sleeves... the sound of kibble in a bowl will send them all scurrying, freeing up the coveted lists and saving Christmas for all! That is to say, as long as Dr. Amber & “St.” Nick can find a similar trick for themselves when trapped in bed by all of the fuzzy-snuggles and and happily purring rein-kittehs urging them to stay.

“St.” Kiera, on the otherhand, doesn’t seem to have any problems motivating herself, as she plans for her eventual take-over of the world!
...or at least the family business. She thought long and hard
about the skills needed to assume the mantle, and came up her own list this year...

Regardless of whether you’ve been
naughty or nice this year,
We wish you all the best for 2019!

In preparation for his appearance on “Dancing with the Elves” this season, “St.” Nick thought it prudent to start taking dance lessons. This was something that he had always wanted to do anyways, but it was made all that much better when he met his new dance-, adventure-, and life-partner there... Dr. Amber.

Unfortunately, due to time commitments regarding preparing for the upcoming holiday season, and other extenuating circumstances, “St.” Nick had to go on a bit of a hiatus from his lessons. Luckily, Dr. Amber continued on, and it was entirely by her expertise that they were able to rise above such stiff competition, and take the title!

Meanwhile, “St.” Kiera has been enjoying her schooling and has grown exponentially - both mentally and physically. She’s 3 going on omnipotent, it seems, and is more ready than ever to take over the “St.” Family business. So between “St.” Kiera’s larger than life presence, and Dr. Amber, and her two rein-kittehs, “St.” Nick finally feels that his team is coming together such that he can hopefully retire soon. That is to say... if the world doesn’t end in the meantime! However, upon reflection of that very topic, “St.” Nick thought it ironic that the current president is so in favor of the coal industry, as that that is all he’ll be geting for Christmas for a very long time to come!

Happiness, Laughter, Health, Love & Peace to All!

As we all know, 2016 was a horrible year (give for a few markedly joyous moments). After losing so many important people and dreams for the future, "St." Nick feared that it was pointless to continue. But rather than cut and run, cry about it, or have to take a day off to recover from the election, he decided to make good on his promises and live up to his responsibilities to bring holiday cheer to all of his friends and family.

Regardless, "St." Nick thought it prudent to have a plan "B"... ya know, just in case. So he set forth on a quest to better himself by losing some of that milk-and-cookies-left-on-the-mantle weight, and better his situation by fixing up his workshop, with the hopes of selling it so he can move closer to the people and places he cares about most. With a lot of help from the "St." Eglich family, plus his crew of mini-clone elves, he has come a long way towards that goal and is looking forward to a brighter future. And, with "St." Kiera taking charge of everything she sees anyways, he figures she'll be taking over the 'family' business soon enough and he and his magical rein-kittehs can finally retire, finish his book, and become famous as an elf-published author.

Happy Holidays &
May Your 2017 Be So Much More Than Just Another Year!

After numerous failed attempts to find a “St.” Girlfriend on sites like elfHarmony, SDate, Dashr, Dancr, Prancr, VixN, and of course, OKCupid - “St.” Nick finally found someone to help him deliver his holiday cheer. It was actually by way of a couple of friends who knew that “St.” Nick was looking and therefore pitched him to her by stating, “He’s jolly, has a team of flying rein-kittehs, and was exceptionally cute as a young elf (further proof that his own wee-elf was a super cutie).” And it worked!

Meanwhile, back in the North Pole, “St.” Kiera has been hard at work, picking up the slack for her dada while he is off enjoying his new relationship. Through careful consideration and a strict vetting process, it has been decided that the children of the world will exclusively be getting LEGOs and ducks this year - two things that are known by her to bring immense joy.

Regardless of whether you get ducks, LEGOs, or a great partner to spend your time with this year, we all hope that it will be filled with happiness, health and all the love that you can handle.

Happiest of Holidays!

Proud and happy that he finally has someone to take over the ‘family business’, “St.” Nick wasted no time in training “St.” Kiera how to drive the sleigh - including the nuances of calling the rein-kittehs on… “On Izza! On Raja! Skyward we go! C’mon chubby kitteh, you’re pulling too slow!” But after a few failed attempts - only “mah bah ah laa la laaa” and a couple of shrill squeeks, it became apparent to “St.” Nick that his pupil was growing weary of her training. It came as no surprise for “St.” Nick to learn that she preferred to take her own path, and instead wanted to lead the team as the first ever baby rein-giraffe! At least she has cute, fuzzy antlers!

Hoping your holidays are filled with as much warmth and love as has ever been - and that your sleigh will be guided by the brightest of lights, as mine surely is.

With all of the precious, new little helpers being born this- and next year, "St." Nick thought it prudent to install a sleigh-set in hopes that he will be able to take them along on his magical journey when they are old enough. Unfortunately, these new-fangled, 5-point-harnessed, can-withstand-re-entry, robo-baby-seats are harder to figure out than they look. But "St." Nick is a firm believer in the phrase, "If you can't fix it, duct it... if you can't duct it... totally freak out, and fly down to the fire station to have them install it for you!"

...and while you are there, it doesn't hurt to get some advice on how best to extinguish a fire on your backside after climbing down someone's chimney!

Sending my love & best holiday wishes to all of my friends and family out there... and especially to all the little ones who make our lives so very special and complete!

In anticipation of "The End Of Days", "St." Nick spent a few days this summer "learning" how to surf. By "learning", I mean: "standing in the water, taking pictures of his friends while he was silently getting pneumonia". Regardless, this training was crucial in his quest to prepare for the inevitable, world-wide floods and ensuing choas. His only thought was why his magical rein-kittehs chose to take the free ride, and didn’t offer to fly him to safety! Note to “St.” self: 1) Wear a damn wet-suit, and 2) have a serious discussion with rein-kittehs over proper end-of-days protocol!

Happy Holidays to All! And to All, Surfs Up, Dudes!!!

After losing a number of “St.” Nick’s head S.T.E.G.L.I.C.H.’s (Specifically Trained Elves for Guaranteeing Love In Children’s Hearts) this year, he has had precious little time to prepare for this holiday season, let alone anything else. So this year, he thought it best to gather himself together and focus on rebuilding - like increasing the resale value of his workshop, finding the ULTIMATE Christmas tree, and training some new recruits like the most recent addition to his family - Raja, the wet-nosed, rein-kitteh. Hopefully by this time next year, he will be ready to send even more happiness, love, cheer, and all good things your way! Until then - Happy Holidays to all!

...And on a personal side-note, I would very much like to congratulate the multitude of my friends & family who this year got engaged, married, had children and/or found love. I wish you the most wonderful and special holidays of them all! You are always in my heart...

"Oh yeah..." thought "St." Nick, "Because 14 naps already today wasn't enough. This is why you don't hire family - they always take advantage of the relationship, demand extra pettin' (especially on the tummy), and feel like they can be even lazier than working-kittehs! We'll never make it now... but I bet if I sent an elf to every house to run the electric can opener, we'd make it in no time!"

In any case, even if you have to work with them too, we hope that you and your family have a wonderful, peaceful, restful,
and altogether happy holiday!

All love, "St." Nick and Izza (aka Dusty McRollaround, Mini-Kitty, Zack)

Due to the struggling economy forcing housing prices down and heating costs up, “St.” Nick decided it was high time to move from the North Pole to a more temperate area, and to a place he could call his own. And while it wasn’t exactly what he had envisioned from his research on ISoldMyNorthPoleWorkshop.com, he knew that with a little elbow grease, the army of cloned worker elves that he created back in 2007, and a little imagination, it will turn out great! Now where to put those reindeer?!?!?

Hoping your holidays are
the greatest yet!

Given the limited choices for president this year, and fearing a similar, repeat performance after the last election, "St." Nick decided to take matters into his own hands and run for office. Unfortunately, his policies on employing "Clean Coal" technology only for bad kids who bathe regularly, his statements about "Spreading the Elf around" and his plans to create a Universal Elf Care System were quite unpopular, even among his own demographic group in the North Pole. This left the political
landscape completely devoid of any Green/Red states this year.

"St." Nick for president in 2012!!!

Happy Holidays and
Warm Wishes for All!

This year, “St.” Nick spent most of his time on elfSpace.com - a sensational new website dedicated to finding old elves, maintaining “Who’s Naughty, Who’s Nice” lists, and keeping in touch with friends and family, such as Rudolph who is still flying for the Air Force in Operation “Red Nosed Reindeer”. Fortunately, “St.” Nick can get a broadband connection in the north pole from his patented DSL (Deer-Satellite Link) service.

Happy Holidays & Warm Wishes for All!

This year, with many of his friends being far away, and with little else to do, St. Nick thought it would be nice to spread his holiday cheer by distributing presents to the fine folks who run this country. It’s about time, he thought, that these people are recognized for their selfless acts of compassion!

Happy Holidays & Warm Wishes for All!

After witnessing the impossibilities of 2004 (the Red Sox winning the world series & W. actually managing to hold onto the presidency), "St." Nick feared that the miracle of Christmas would be somewhat less miraculous in comparison. So this year, he decided to stay inside, law low, and focus on hiring a new 'Rudolph' for the upcoming season.

Hope your holidays are miraculous & filled with joy!!!

This year Rudolph decided that he would fulfill his instrinctual ego and quest for dominance - not by scraping his antlers on a tree, or even by being the Top Gun for "St." Nick anymore. Nope, this year he figured that the best way to prove himself was to pilot the raw force of an F-15 fighter jet and feel the wind in his antlers.

Happy Holidays!

St. Nick called it quits today when he realized that kids these days just aren't as sweet and innocent as they used to be... especially not this one!

Happy Holidays!

Fearing that reindeer are not Y2K compliant, and with the projected inflation of reindeer maintenance costs over the next year, St. Nick turns to a more conventional, hip and "fun" method of delivering presents.

Happy Holidays!

This is "St." Nick... Been abducted by my not-so-evil alien twins... Send help or Christmas might be done for... Monetary contributions a plus. Transmission Out.

Just wanted to send you some holiday cheer and wish you and yours very happy holidays...

If only "St." Nick had been born St. Pimp, then he could deliver mad-fly hoochies to all the little kiddies instead of the same old, boring toys every year!

Happy Holidays

Little Susy's dreams were crushed when she realized that St. Nick had lied to her about teh validity of his new, replacement 'reindeer', Ralph.

Happy Holidays!!

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